So, we got a majority of our stuff moved yesterday! Talk about overwhelming!! I went to the new house right away with the kids and I stayed all day......trying to find places for boxes, furniture, food, etc. Of course, Mr. Baby Guy still wasn't feeling well, so he whined most of the time. It was stressful and overwhelming......but I'm glad the big stuff is done! I would also like to thank Adam, Dylan, and my Mom for all their hard work yesterday!! It's very much appreciated!! Without you, we wouldn't even be close to being done!!
Yesterday, we got our internet hooked up and today we got our tv hooked up........so we are again connected to the outside world! The kids are actually sitting quietly watching tv and the baby is taking a nap. It's semi-quiet in my house right now.........knock on wood..........
So, Owen and Julian are sharing a room, Cleo has her own little room, and Jeff and I are sharing our room with the baby. I think we all slept great last night.....we were all so flippin exhausted! I am still exhausted today, but we have to get some stuff done today yet.
I thought I would take a minute to write the we are fine, the move is mostly done, and now it's all about unpacking and organizing.........
I will post more later!
~Rachelle
Saturday, January 23, 2010
Friday, January 15, 2010
A couple funnies for the day
Okay, so I know yesterday's post was probably hideously depressing, so I will write some funny stuff today! Yesterday, I brought Cleo and Westin to the doctor for their 3 year and 1 year appointments. The annoying thing.......we were there for 2 hours!! Seriously? I sat in a little room with a 3 and 1 year old for 2 hours trying to keep them happy and quiet......quite the task! Well, when we first got there, Cleo was playing in the waiting room and another little girl came up to her and they started playing next to each other. The little girl got called back and after a couple minutes Cleo stood up, looked around and said, "Hey, where my girlfriend go?" I laughed (partly because I've never heard her use the word girlfriend before and because she's so flippin cute sometimes!) I said, "She probably went to see her doctor." Then Cleo says, "Oh, she run off...." It was too cute! Then, a little later in the waiting room (yeah, we were in the waiting room for like 20 minutes....ugh!) Cleo and I were talking about going to see her doctor. She says, "Hey, where my doctor?" I said, "We have to wait for them to call your name, then you can go see your doctor." Cleo says, "Oh, we are customers?" I laughed and said, "Yes, we are customers." Where do they learn this stuff?? Just the way she said it made me laugh!!
And, to update everyone on the size of my children.......Cleo is small for her age and Westin is small for his age, too. Westin's head circumference is below the 3%!! My children have wee heads! Oh well. Cleo had to do a hearing test and a vision test.....and she passed with flying colors! She also got her teeth painted with fluoride. (I thought they only did that at the dentist.....huh.) Of course the shots were NOT the highlight of the appointment. I'm sure I have a harder time with it than they do. I thought I was ready to have a second panic attack, though. They can be so flippin slow at the doctor's office!! It's like, can we just get this over with so I can take my crying children home??? So, Cleo got 2 pokes and Westin got 4 pokes. :(
Today, Julian has his 5 year check up, but Jeff is bringing him to that one!! I can't handle being in that office again today!! So, we'll see how Julian is doing!! He even had to pee in a cup!! He did not like that idea, but he did it. For the past week he's been freaking out about having to pee in a cup. He would cry every time we would talk about it. So, when he would pick on Cleo, she would say, "Juli, you go pee in a cup!" Then he would bawl all over again! It was actually quite hilarious!! (I know, I'm terrible!!)
Well, there's a few funnies for the day! I need to go watch Ellen Degeneres now, though, so I can laugh some more! I hope you all have a wonderful day!
~Rachelle :)
And, to update everyone on the size of my children.......Cleo is small for her age and Westin is small for his age, too. Westin's head circumference is below the 3%!! My children have wee heads! Oh well. Cleo had to do a hearing test and a vision test.....and she passed with flying colors! She also got her teeth painted with fluoride. (I thought they only did that at the dentist.....huh.) Of course the shots were NOT the highlight of the appointment. I'm sure I have a harder time with it than they do. I thought I was ready to have a second panic attack, though. They can be so flippin slow at the doctor's office!! It's like, can we just get this over with so I can take my crying children home??? So, Cleo got 2 pokes and Westin got 4 pokes. :(
Today, Julian has his 5 year check up, but Jeff is bringing him to that one!! I can't handle being in that office again today!! So, we'll see how Julian is doing!! He even had to pee in a cup!! He did not like that idea, but he did it. For the past week he's been freaking out about having to pee in a cup. He would cry every time we would talk about it. So, when he would pick on Cleo, she would say, "Juli, you go pee in a cup!" Then he would bawl all over again! It was actually quite hilarious!! (I know, I'm terrible!!)
Well, there's a few funnies for the day! I need to go watch Ellen Degeneres now, though, so I can laugh some more! I hope you all have a wonderful day!
~Rachelle :)
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Well, my baby is officially a one year old!
Oh boy....where has the last year gone? Really!? It feels like I was just in the hospital getting ready to have my last little baby boy.......and now he's one! And he has a tooth, and he rolls everywhere, and he laughs, and he plays, and he loves baby food (of course not the 'real' stuff, not with his gag reflexes!!) He is a mini person. I am fascinated by him everyday. I always wonder what he's thinking about and how he feels when he watches us (me, Jeff, Owen, Julian, and Cleo). I wonder what he would say if he could talk?? These are the things I think about.
But I also have some very negative thoughts sometimes. Perhaps this isn't the appropriate place to spill my crazy thoughts and feelings, but I have no filter and I don't hide who I am. I'm not even typing this so everyone will read it......more to get these feelings out of me. To see if I'm crazy......am I the only one who thinks crazy things sometimes?? Most of you know that I've been on Prozac for over 5 years now. It's been a lifesaver for me.....literally! But, after having 4 kids and my body changing and my hormones going haywire and my body just building up a tolerance.......it just doesn't work the same as it used to. Now, Prozac makes me tired and sluggish. I don't want to be 'that' mom. I want to have energy and play with my kids and go on exciting adventures. I want that. So, a few months back I decided I wanted to start taking Wellbutrin. I was smoking a lot at the time (about a 1/2 pack a day). It was a terrible habit for me and I had heard that Wellbutrin helps with that. So, I called my doctor and pretty much prescribed myself my own meds.........I started taking it and I had so much energy! I quit smoking, literally, the next day! Crazy! I lost a couple 'baby pounds' from my pregnancy and I felt good. But then I noticed that I always felt edgy and angry. So, I thought I'd quit taking the Wellbutrin. I quit and went back to Prozac......and I was back to my sluggish self again. And I was still angry and having panic attacks.......so, I just decided to start taking Wellbutrin again. It's been almost a week now and I am feeling A LOT of side effects......and it's freaking me out......I can't stop clenching my jaw, I'm super impatient, I get nasty headaches, and I can't stop tapping my foot when I'm sitting down. (I know.....you're thinking....."and what are the benefits to this medicine again??") Well, it does give me lots of energy.....I've been exercising every morning. I don't eat because I'm bored, so I'm not packing on the pounds. But I like the feeling of being energized. At home, I really lack energy to do a lot of things......and I don't know how to change it. So, I thought if I could take a pill that would do it for me, then why not? Well, today I experienced something so incredibly horrifying that I feel lost now. Jeff, Julian, Cleo, Westin, and I went to Target this afternoon to get some stuff. (Owen was at school). We were driving home (Jeff was driving and I was the passenger) and I saw a van get kinda close to our van.......then I started thinking, "What if we get in a car accident on the way home and Owen shows up at the front door and he's locked out and scared and doesn't know what to do? What if we all die on the way home and Owen is left all alone?" Okay, you might think this an odd thought to think in the car.......for me, though, this is a daily occurance. And once I started thinking about Owen arriving at home with no one to greet him, I started losing my breath. I tried to breathe deeply and slowly, but everything started to look fuzzy and I felt like I was going to pass out. I started uncontrollably crying and then my arms went numb. By this time, we had just pulled into the garage. I couldn't move my hands....they felt frozen......I was bawling.....I couldn't stop.....I felt like I wasn't even in my body. There was a point when I asked myself in my head, "Is this seriously happening right now? You've got to be kidding me.....you are insane!" Jeff had to help me out of the van and I couldn't move my arms.....there was a crazy tingling feeling running up and down my arms.....it felt like electricity and I could NOT move my fingers. I laid on the couch for a while and finally calmed down. My breathing returned to normal and I stopped crying.......and, as quickly as it came, it was all gone. The numbness was gone. I felt tired, but I felt like me again. And now I'm starting to think I am crazy! I am taking medications that are suppose to STOP panic attacks! What the heck?!
For those of you who have never experienced a panic attack, well, you're lucky. It's truly a terrifying experience. I felt like I was dying. Really. At one point I was ready to tell Jeff to call 911. That's how scared I was........ It's really an indescribable feeling (even though I just tried to describe it.....) I've had many panic attacks, but nothing like this. I always get them when I'm driving. I'm not afraid to drive.....that's the thing. Weird, I know. But I am worried that if these things keep happening, I WILL be terrified to drive. I know I should probably be on some sort of medication, and perhaps this is just a coincidence........Maybe I changed my meds too quickly. I don't know. I just really feel scared and worried and sad.......and Jeff leaves soon. I have to be strong for my kids. I have to do everything for 14 weeks. I will be mom AND dad. I know I can do it, but it terrifies me just the same. Perhaps this will pass and everything will be fine tomorrow. Who knows? I just had to get this stuff out of me so I don't explode! For those of you who actually read this whole thing.......thank you and I'm sorry. How horribly depressing am I??? Ugh! I promise, my next blog will be more positive. So, I will stop for tonight and go relax for a bit.
Rachelle
But I also have some very negative thoughts sometimes. Perhaps this isn't the appropriate place to spill my crazy thoughts and feelings, but I have no filter and I don't hide who I am. I'm not even typing this so everyone will read it......more to get these feelings out of me. To see if I'm crazy......am I the only one who thinks crazy things sometimes?? Most of you know that I've been on Prozac for over 5 years now. It's been a lifesaver for me.....literally! But, after having 4 kids and my body changing and my hormones going haywire and my body just building up a tolerance.......it just doesn't work the same as it used to. Now, Prozac makes me tired and sluggish. I don't want to be 'that' mom. I want to have energy and play with my kids and go on exciting adventures. I want that. So, a few months back I decided I wanted to start taking Wellbutrin. I was smoking a lot at the time (about a 1/2 pack a day). It was a terrible habit for me and I had heard that Wellbutrin helps with that. So, I called my doctor and pretty much prescribed myself my own meds.........I started taking it and I had so much energy! I quit smoking, literally, the next day! Crazy! I lost a couple 'baby pounds' from my pregnancy and I felt good. But then I noticed that I always felt edgy and angry. So, I thought I'd quit taking the Wellbutrin. I quit and went back to Prozac......and I was back to my sluggish self again. And I was still angry and having panic attacks.......so, I just decided to start taking Wellbutrin again. It's been almost a week now and I am feeling A LOT of side effects......and it's freaking me out......I can't stop clenching my jaw, I'm super impatient, I get nasty headaches, and I can't stop tapping my foot when I'm sitting down. (I know.....you're thinking....."and what are the benefits to this medicine again??") Well, it does give me lots of energy.....I've been exercising every morning. I don't eat because I'm bored, so I'm not packing on the pounds. But I like the feeling of being energized. At home, I really lack energy to do a lot of things......and I don't know how to change it. So, I thought if I could take a pill that would do it for me, then why not? Well, today I experienced something so incredibly horrifying that I feel lost now. Jeff, Julian, Cleo, Westin, and I went to Target this afternoon to get some stuff. (Owen was at school). We were driving home (Jeff was driving and I was the passenger) and I saw a van get kinda close to our van.......then I started thinking, "What if we get in a car accident on the way home and Owen shows up at the front door and he's locked out and scared and doesn't know what to do? What if we all die on the way home and Owen is left all alone?" Okay, you might think this an odd thought to think in the car.......for me, though, this is a daily occurance. And once I started thinking about Owen arriving at home with no one to greet him, I started losing my breath. I tried to breathe deeply and slowly, but everything started to look fuzzy and I felt like I was going to pass out. I started uncontrollably crying and then my arms went numb. By this time, we had just pulled into the garage. I couldn't move my hands....they felt frozen......I was bawling.....I couldn't stop.....I felt like I wasn't even in my body. There was a point when I asked myself in my head, "Is this seriously happening right now? You've got to be kidding me.....you are insane!" Jeff had to help me out of the van and I couldn't move my arms.....there was a crazy tingling feeling running up and down my arms.....it felt like electricity and I could NOT move my fingers. I laid on the couch for a while and finally calmed down. My breathing returned to normal and I stopped crying.......and, as quickly as it came, it was all gone. The numbness was gone. I felt tired, but I felt like me again. And now I'm starting to think I am crazy! I am taking medications that are suppose to STOP panic attacks! What the heck?!
For those of you who have never experienced a panic attack, well, you're lucky. It's truly a terrifying experience. I felt like I was dying. Really. At one point I was ready to tell Jeff to call 911. That's how scared I was........ It's really an indescribable feeling (even though I just tried to describe it.....) I've had many panic attacks, but nothing like this. I always get them when I'm driving. I'm not afraid to drive.....that's the thing. Weird, I know. But I am worried that if these things keep happening, I WILL be terrified to drive. I know I should probably be on some sort of medication, and perhaps this is just a coincidence........Maybe I changed my meds too quickly. I don't know. I just really feel scared and worried and sad.......and Jeff leaves soon. I have to be strong for my kids. I have to do everything for 14 weeks. I will be mom AND dad. I know I can do it, but it terrifies me just the same. Perhaps this will pass and everything will be fine tomorrow. Who knows? I just had to get this stuff out of me so I don't explode! For those of you who actually read this whole thing.......thank you and I'm sorry. How horribly depressing am I??? Ugh! I promise, my next blog will be more positive. So, I will stop for tonight and go relax for a bit.
Rachelle
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
The new year.....so far......
So far, 2010 has been alright. Owen is back at school after winter break, Julian is back at preschool, and I even started a little online school. I'm taking a couple online college classes this semester for a couple reasons. #1- It will defer my current student loans (he he) #2- It will give me something to do while Jeff is away. I'm not planning on working while he's gone. I think it would be way too crazy if I do that. So.....since I LOVE school, I think it will be a perfect "out" for me! Plus, I'm taking a class that I'm interested in......Eastern Religions. I've always wanted to learn more about them, so now is my chance! Plus, my mom is in the same class.....so we can help each other and study together if need be!
It's official. We will start moving into our new townhouse on January 22nd! That's only 10 days away! Eeeeek! I am excited and terrified at the same time. First of all, we are going to be down-sizing. We have SO MUCH STUFF! I don't know how we'll cram all of it in that house. I'm sure we will, though. Plus, there's only 3 bedrooms, not 4. And the bedrooms are smaller. BUT, the laundry room is upstairs by all the bedrooms! That's a total plus for me! Right now our laundry closet is nowhere near our bedrooms!! And, instead of 2 bathrooms, we will have 3! Also a plus. The biggest plus will be living next to my wonderful friend Katie!! Yep, we planned it out......we will be nextdoor neighbors! Our kids can play more often, we can take turns driving Teagan and Julian to preschool, and we can just help each other out!! I think Katie and I will both feel safer living next to each other!
And, can I just say, my baby boy will be 1 year old in 2 days!!! Where did my baby go?! He finally cut his first tooth, too! And Jeff told me last night that Owen has his first loose tooth!! My oldest is going to lose a tooth and my youngest is just getting his. Wow, how time flies.......
We have some doctor appointments for the kids this week, so I'll have to update everyone on how the kids are growing and whatnot. Cleo is just getting over an ear infection........poor thing. First Westin, then Cleo. It's weird, because I don't remember ever having an ear infection. If I did, I was really young. I know Jeff had them ALL THE TIME, though. So, they must get that from him. Poor little chicklets. :(
Any way.....let's end this on a positive note, right?! The kids are doing fine, they are happy, they are healthy (for the most part), and they are still as crazy as ever!! Jeff has been exercising everyday and getting ready to leave.....(only 41 days until he leaves). And I have also been trying to exercise. I've been doing a little Yoga in the morning. I think it's working and giving more energy. Now I just have to keep it up! Speaking of yoga......I need to go do it now! So I will end this blog here.
I will post more soon.
~Rachelle
It's official. We will start moving into our new townhouse on January 22nd! That's only 10 days away! Eeeeek! I am excited and terrified at the same time. First of all, we are going to be down-sizing. We have SO MUCH STUFF! I don't know how we'll cram all of it in that house. I'm sure we will, though. Plus, there's only 3 bedrooms, not 4. And the bedrooms are smaller. BUT, the laundry room is upstairs by all the bedrooms! That's a total plus for me! Right now our laundry closet is nowhere near our bedrooms!! And, instead of 2 bathrooms, we will have 3! Also a plus. The biggest plus will be living next to my wonderful friend Katie!! Yep, we planned it out......we will be nextdoor neighbors! Our kids can play more often, we can take turns driving Teagan and Julian to preschool, and we can just help each other out!! I think Katie and I will both feel safer living next to each other!
And, can I just say, my baby boy will be 1 year old in 2 days!!! Where did my baby go?! He finally cut his first tooth, too! And Jeff told me last night that Owen has his first loose tooth!! My oldest is going to lose a tooth and my youngest is just getting his. Wow, how time flies.......
We have some doctor appointments for the kids this week, so I'll have to update everyone on how the kids are growing and whatnot. Cleo is just getting over an ear infection........poor thing. First Westin, then Cleo. It's weird, because I don't remember ever having an ear infection. If I did, I was really young. I know Jeff had them ALL THE TIME, though. So, they must get that from him. Poor little chicklets. :(
Any way.....let's end this on a positive note, right?! The kids are doing fine, they are happy, they are healthy (for the most part), and they are still as crazy as ever!! Jeff has been exercising everyday and getting ready to leave.....(only 41 days until he leaves). And I have also been trying to exercise. I've been doing a little Yoga in the morning. I think it's working and giving more energy. Now I just have to keep it up! Speaking of yoga......I need to go do it now! So I will end this blog here.
I will post more soon.
~Rachelle
Monday, January 4, 2010
Ahhhhhh.......the stress of 2010.....
Okay, so I was totally thinking that 2010 would be ten times better than 2009.......and I think it still will be, but man! Really?!? I am so very frustrated right now. We just found out that instead of moving February 1st, we might be moving sooner! Our short-sale realtor said that it looks like the bank FINALLY approved things and we have a tentative closing date of January 20th. If that's the case, then we need to move into our rental townhouse even sooner. It's fine.....because the people we are renting from are very flexible. That's not even the issue.......I realized something last night that throws us for a little loop..........When we move, Owen will NOT be going to the same elementary school. I assumed that since we would be physically closer to the school, that he would stay there. Nope. I was wrong. I just happened to look at the boundary map last night and he will have to go to Big Woods Elementary. It's not that I'm bummed about the school.......I'm bummed for Owen. He's such a good student and he's a quiet kid and he enjoys routines. This is going to completely deviate from his usual routine. He's such a sensitive boy that I'm afraid he's going to freak out or something!! I know I am probably more worried about this than I need to be.....I'm overreacting. But I just feel so bad for him. Not only does he have to deal with moving to a new house and his daddy leaving for 14 weeks, but now he has to adjust to a new school for the end of the year. I know, I'm just whining. It's stupid. It is what it is. There's not much I can do about it. I just feel bad when my kids worry or are upset about things. Oh well........such is life, right?
And, to top it off, I have a sick child and a sick husband at home right now. Julian has been fevering for almost 24 hours now and Jeff looks like death warmed over about 10 times........I don't feel the greatest, but I know I definitely feel better than they both do. Blah Blah Blah....... I will quit complaining now.
So, basically, my life is a little up in the air right now. I have no idea when we are moving, I don't have my house packed yet, I don't know who Owen's teacher will be..........I shall wait and find out!
Well, I'm going to go rest for a bit while I have the chance. I hope everyone is having a fantastic 2010 so far and I hope to write more positive things next time! :)
~Rachelle
And, to top it off, I have a sick child and a sick husband at home right now. Julian has been fevering for almost 24 hours now and Jeff looks like death warmed over about 10 times........I don't feel the greatest, but I know I definitely feel better than they both do. Blah Blah Blah....... I will quit complaining now.
So, basically, my life is a little up in the air right now. I have no idea when we are moving, I don't have my house packed yet, I don't know who Owen's teacher will be..........I shall wait and find out!
Well, I'm going to go rest for a bit while I have the chance. I hope everyone is having a fantastic 2010 so far and I hope to write more positive things next time! :)
~Rachelle
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